Substitute # 5. Electric Toothbrush. Abduct it when the kids aren,t looking and force it into sexual slavery. Bugs Bunny will soon become your favourite buzzy partner in a life of crime. A caution – do NOT put toothpaste on it first. You don’t want to be foaming at the lips, and unable to spit at the right time…

This is an excerpt from a Planet Sex column, found only at For The Girls – the online magazine that gets you laughing and gets you off!